Soliloquy

Blissful soul,
Not an illusion,
Not after what we did
Delusion,
In time.

Beating hearts,
Escaping from permanence,
Miles from reality but verging
Perpetuation,
After life.

Telling lies,
Striding after activity,
Never peaceful and killing me
Calm,
Truthful hurt.

Loving you,
Chose to walk,
Chose hurt over love anyway,
Haunting,
Terrifying nights.

Grudging mind,
Making peace with
Inner demons and battles within,
Secluded,
Keeps trying.

Dead heartbeat,
Emerges feeling better,
Working its way through
Conflicted,
Always running.