Soliloquy

And as I lay dying, breathless and in torment
I asked myself what kind of life I had spent
Had it been one full of highs and secret lows
Was it the right alternative I regularly chose?

The Gods paid me a visit but they were not kind
“We’ll just take a look around, if you don’t mind
I hope you’re not hurting, of course you’re not
Chase the storm: that’s what you were taught?”

I looked around for the ocean but found a field
In its middle, a strip of twenty-two yards revealed
Looked around for friends but they’d jumped the gun
A good way to pacify my mind than say I had none

It was a life full of breathtaking joys and some sorrow
Pity I won’t be around to see the rose-beds tomorrow
But it’s not issues of seen beauty that breaks my heart
It’s not having my loved ones around tearing me apart

I had always wondered what would become of my soul
Will it rot like my body and become as black as coal?
Will I become bereft of touch and scream at every man
Who’d have helped me but that wasn’t part of his plan?

As I lay dying, I remembered all those 100s I had scored
Funny how those numbers are hidden inside getting stored
Those numbers tell stories even though I don’t agree
And as I lay dying they slowly come back to set me free

As I lay dying, I remembered those lives I had touched
And all the catches and runs I had effortlessly misjudged
I remembered telling her I loved her as I looked into her eye
We would’ve flown high together but that dream had to die

The next thing I remember is waking up at 4.45
The rising Sun peeks and tells me I’m still alive
There’re hills to be climbed, with tiny roads steep
There are a thousand miles to go before I sleep.